I miss youuuuuu

I got off work today and was so tired I haven't done anything. I've been a useless lump of protoplasm.

I'm playing cards with John and Justin, My Lord and Pagemaster Forever Amen and shooting them hateful glances for their horrible waste of their free time.

I wish I could join you in that endeavor.

Will it ever be Christmas again?

We're playing Munchkin, watching the homeless people and sultry college girls walk by.
Hah I meant to type slutty but I'm leaving it

Too goddam sultry in here.

It's not dead, I just woke up too late with much hangover and I'm just an insufferable asshole who delights in making you all suffer.

You're just saying that to try to get on our good side

I am the dweller on the threshold, avatar of Yog-Sothoth, the key and the gate. I exist outside of what you perceive as time. I am timeless. I have made all posts that I will ever make and I have made none of them at once. The posts that appear in the future have already come to pass in my domain. And I delight in your pain and anguish as you wait for them, to pass the time by in your brief, eyeblink of a life.

<3 <3 <3 <3 <3
MOAR LIKE THIS

Turn 10

Whizzaahd carefully weighs the problem of masturbation versus investigation(6). He does some quck math in his head, deciding that cupcakes basically equal sex, and masturbation only equals lonely sex; therefor, masturbation equals lonely cupcakes, subtract the lonely from both sides, a couple other quick substitutions, and end up with cupcakes equal sex with girls with boobs, plus frosting (it makes sense if you look at the equations). He hollers at his mom that he's going outside, to which she responds, "Honey, are you sure? The sun's out right now."

Whizzahd rolls his eyes as he manages to remove his girth from the computer chair, which makes a suction cup popping sound as he does. He grabs his laptop case and heads out the door, only to be bombarded by terrifying UV radiation! Oh god! It burns his pale flesh, (2 to dodge) causing severe cosmetic damage and blindness! He's not sure if he'll ever be able to pwn n00bs again right now. He heads in the direction that he thinks the cupcake store is in, trying to grow accustomed to his horrible new life of permanent darkness.
---

Glancing down at the human head at his toes (6), Alan winds up and punts the thing as hard as he can into the river of lost dreams, causing it to actually smash into the opposite wall with such impact that blood and brain matter ejects from the ears and gets in Alan's mouth a little bit. Yuk. (2 to dodge) Alan's pretty sure that he just contracted cyberherpes from that. He turns to the smug little hovering robot and beseeches it for some sort of sanitizer (3-1=2), but can't really talk with the gummy brain goo in his teeth, so he just sort of angrily flails his arms.

Finally patching his cortex to his audio outputs (4), Gerardtron (in a Stephen Hawking voice, because he wanted to try that one out first. Well, it was between that and the sultry nurse voice.) asks the hapless young man, "What do you need?"

"Damnit," Ty grunts, "I can't get my GPS to update down in these tunnels (2). Fucking Verizon. I have no idea how to get from here to our extraction team!"

"Would it just be the ladder next to a sign that says 'to Happy Ending's Hair Sarron--er, Salon?'" asks Alan, finally spitting the last of the goo from his mouth.

"Yeah, that's probably it. You'll have to guide me though for a minute until my eyes come back online. Also, when did this robot learn to talk? I didn't know they made this model with enough intelligence to speak."
---

"The gutterpunks you hired to acquire the boy and his companion have failed, sir." The well-dressed man spoke to a fiercely pretty Asian woman who sat behind a large mahogany desk in a very large, but mostly baron and exceedingly dimly-lit office. Behind her was a window that took up most of the wall, and had a large, faintly purple stepped pyramid logo etched into it. The view through the window looked down on one of the nicest districts of Neo-Noir City, but New Kowloon was visible in the distance, sprawling across the inner-city island that the walled shantytown grew on like an infested nest of vermin.

"Well then," she spoke slowly, with an almost amused tone in her voice, "We'll just have to send someone else, won't we Mr. Murphey?" The woman stood and turned toward the window, clasping her hands behind her back. The red and black fabric of her tight dress clung to her shapely hips as she looked out over the city. "Come back to us Freyr," she whispered to herself, then, without turning from the window, she addressed Murphey, "See to it that Gemini is functioning properly; I don't want to hear about her trying to branch out into the net again. Not yet anyway. And get a fucking specialist this time to track down Artemis. Shoot whoever had the idea to use a goddamned gang of punks. You're dismissed."

Whizzaahd is going to hail a taxi because fuck walking. Does this body look like it walks?

Ty will climb the ladder.

This is the inspiration for my character. Add a fedora and a hot pocket and there it is.

Alan too, being sure to keep an eye on the blind dude hanging over him.
(Assuming they reach the top safely) He'll collapse on the sidewalk and kiss the pavement in joy. He's had a really rough day.

He's not fat enough

God I want to play that game again Ryan. It's actually next on my list to order after the Eldritch Horror expansion.

What game is it?

Android: Netrunner

Card game by the designer of Magic: the Gathering in which one player is a hacker and the other player is a mega-corporation. The Corp tries to advance its secret agendas and the hacker tries to break into their servers and steal them. Its a ton of fun.

Ooooo that sounds fun

it was way too hot to go to the store. but I have strawberry shortcake now.

Strawberry shortcake is delicious. Android: netrunner doubly so.